The word ‘should’, and our internal belief system about the ‘right’ way to do things, comes from our Superego, which has been formed over the course of our lives through our parents, our upbringing and our schooling.

Even if we have 20 colleagues who we get on well with, if there is ONE who we find difficult then they can take up so much of our thinking, our time and our emotional energy.

One of the difficulties with a ‘gut feeling’ is that it can’t be quantified - and, of course, we’re not always right. But as you learn from each thing that happens, you start to develop more intuition that is based on this experience.

Being a leader is one of the hardest things to do. You may not have realised it at first, but becoming a Team Leader isn’t just a change in responsibilities. It is a change in STATUS. How you are perceived by others, and how YOU perceive yourself.

For your workload to become realistic and achievable (assuming you are proficient at your job), you need to feel able to have honest, frank conversations with your manager. So, the RELATIONSHIP BETWEEN YOU is the most important factor

Remember that your colleagues are human beings too. Yes, even your manager, and the business owners! In the counselling world, there is a term called ‘Splitting’, which describes our tendency to only see certain parts of other people’s characters (and our own).

It is important to remember that everyone has their own unique perspective on things, influenced by their own history and experience, and whatever is happening for them in that moment. These different perspectives are often at the root of conflict at work - and our different personality traits will also influence how we act on these perspectives.